Knowing Both the Sweet and the Cruel Memories
by Linnay
Summary: ONESHOT.SLASH.AU.OOC.Another exchange student makes a declaration of love to Harry out of the blue. Who is this person and why does Harry feel a connection to him?
1. Sweet and Cruel Memories  Part 1

**Disclaimers: **I do not own any of the characters or elements from either universe. They all belong to their respective owners, J.K. Rowling and Sunrise. I lay no claim to either franchise. This is purely written for my own and others' enjoyment and I make no money of it.

**Summary: **Another exchange student makes a declaration of love to Harry out of the blue. Who is this person and why does Harry feel a connection to him?

**Pairing: **Heero/Harry/Heero.

**Warnings: Oneshot.** **SLASH.** **AU. **(no Gundams and no magic)** OOC. Bisexual Harry.**

**Author's note: **This is another oneshot written as a try to relieve me of my writer's block when it comes to my longer stories.

Knowing Both the Sweet and the Cruel Memories

Part one

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><p>'Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose.'<p>

From the television show _The Wonder Years_

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><p>"I love you."<p>

Harry stared. And he stared.

The raven haired young male felt his eyebrow twitch once. The remaining crowd who were still left in the lecture hall spilled out, passing him on the way. A few threw him glances, but most resumed their conversations and hurried away to make as much use of their allotted lunch time as possible; the girls to catch up on gossip, the guys to joke about the new professor. The lunch hour which Harry had been planning to also use well. The Thai restaurant he liked to go to were about a ten minute walk away and it was a popular one. He might have to wait another ten minutes, depending on the rush, before he even got a free table too. That left him with approximately forty minutes to get seated, fetch his food (it was a lunch buffet) and eat it with just enough time not to receive a stomach ache from rushing the food down. Excuse him for preferring to have time to actually enjoy the food. Five minutes of that time had already gone by now though, because of this unforeseen obstacle.

Harry felt his eyebrow twitch once more as he eyed the slightly smaller male standing before him. The guy was in the same class, as well as an exchange student like Harry, but probably from the US (Harry was from Great Britain himself) if you judged the accent alone. Were you to judge the looks however, Harry would place him from somewhere in Asia, maybe Korea or Japan. Though, all of that was irrelevant at the moment. What Harry wanted to know was; why was he standing in Harry's way, why was he glaring at him and why, oh why in the name of all mighty, did he just say he _loved_ Harry? I mean, seriously, _loved_? And saying it with that face? Did he accidently mistake the word love with hate or something?

The object of Harry's incredulity had the nerve to just stand there, glaring at him and his back straight and stiff. Even his hands were hanging by his sides straight as arrows; only the guy's hair defied his all-around stiffness, a dark brown colored mop of hair that rebelled against gravity. It reminded Harry of his own bird's nest of a hairstyle, although his wasn't breaking the law of nature to the same extent. He absentmindedly wondered how much gel would take to tame the wild tresses.

Harry righted the band of his messenger bag, casting the student a dubious look, before he took a discreet step to the side and quickly bypassed the guy. If he hurried it he could still make it to the restaurant with twenty-five minutes left to eat his heart out. A hand grasped his right wrist and he ended up swinging around to face the guy again.

"Oi!" Harry let out in an affronted cry. And he had been trying to be nice too, and let the guy avoid any more unnecessary embarrassment by walking away and forgetting the whole thing, but, oh no. The guy was stupid enough to not grasp his generous offer.

The guy's eyes pierced his and Harry couldn't help the small freeze at the mere intensity of them.

"I love you." He repeated, and if anything his look became harsher than before. Harry was mildly impressed.

Was this guy off his rocker or something? Harry frowned at him, and then, shook his hand out of the other's grip and finally managed his quick escape, leaving the guy by the door to the lecture hall.

He could feel the guy's eyes drilling into the back of his neck all the way until Harry disappeared around a corner and out into the main hall. Out of sight Harry breathed a sigh and shook his head, slowing his step. He did his best to put the guy to the back of his mind and focus on getting food into his stomach. He'd lost enough time already.

As suspected, Harry spent the first half of the last lecture after lunch with an annoying stomach ache. Running back to the university right after the meal hadn't been a good idea, but necessary nonetheless if he didn't want to be tardy. He did his best to focus on the lecturer but the irregular thumping in his middle section made it hard to do so. The only positive aspect about the whole thing, since he was not in the mood, was that the grimace on his face caused the other people not to engage him in any silly mundane topics that he had no interest in. On the other side it was a shame since it had only been a month since he started at the university and so didn't know any people yet, besides his two roommates, that is. But better that than he ending up throwing away nasty comments just because his mood was in a dark pit at the moment. He didn't think that was the way to go when acquiring friends either.

Harry concentrated an irritated stare at the clock and inwardly cursed it for its slowness today. In the corner of his eye he had, from the start of the lecture, been made aware of a pair of eyes flicking his way every now and then at even intervals. His bad mood got even sourer at this and his inner cursing changed target to the owner of those eyes. It was that guy's bloody fault his tummy was in a knot. Harry duly and rightfully, in his opinion, ignored the eyes and felt a small childish satisfaction at it which he would deny straight away if ever asked.

Not feeling up to it anymore as his stomach decided to turn up the volume; Harry abandoned the lecture when there was barely fifteen minutes left and went straight home. As soon as he got home he threw his bag in the corner of his room and dumped himself on the bed for a nap. Hopefully he would sleep away the last duration of the stomach ache.

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><p>At the university the exchange students only have regular lectures on Mondays and Thursdays, and every Wednesday they have three hours of Swedish language class that is obligatory for most of the exchange students coming to study at the university. The exchange program lasts for the duration of six months and Harry had only on a whim applied for the program. Having only ever been inside the borders of the UK, Harry thought the chance to go abroad, even if only to Scandinavia, was an interesting enough opportunity. He didn't say no to the extra credit either .<p>

Discovering that most of the country's population was pretty sufficient in the English language as well was a nice surprise. At least it simplified going shopping and communicating when he went out. He shared a flat with two other guys who were both of local origin. They were pleasant enough and he'd had no troubles with them so far. Well, maybe only that one of them had a tendency to forget his dirty laundry lying about in the shared bathroom.

After he'd woken up from his nap, in a considerably better mood, and reviewed his notes; Harry had been struck by curiosity and gone on the internet to check out the participators list for the course. He was going to try and see if he couldn't find out the name to that guy from earlier this day. He didn't have any memory of ever hearing the guy being addressed during lectures. But then the lecturer they'd had up till now didn't care much for roll calls. It was up to each student whether to make an appearance at the lectures and pass the assignments.

Finding the list after a few minutes of searching; Harry opened it into a separate window and began scanning it from top to bottom. Since he didn't have much to go on, except for the guy's Asian looks, he took the easy way and searched for any Asian looking names on the list. He went through the first part without finding any (surprisingly enough since the international business school had a large number of attending Asian exchange students), until he passed his own name and got to the last section. His fingers froze above the scroll button on the mouse. There. There it was, the only seemingly Asian name on the whole list, again surprisingly. Maybe because this was a freestanding history course courtesy of the teaching school?

'_Yuy, Heero._'

Harry read the name and a pair of glaring eyes popped up inside his mind. His eyebrows drew together in a frown. Heero…where had he heard that name before? Bus as far as Harry knew, he didn't or hadn't known any Asians back in UK. He was interrupted by a knock on the door and, closing down the window, went to see what one of his roommates must want with him now.

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><p>The lady they had in the Swedish language class was an oddball to say the least; in the way how she always cheerily talked about the things she'd been up to in-between the classes while she passed around the attendance list for everyone to sign. Harry had the brief thought that last time he must have seen this guy's name on the list; hence he'd thought he'd seen or heard the name before, two days earlier, when checking the list on the internet.<p>

While the teacher was in her own monologue about her two Bombay cats' recent mischief (the class wondering what relevance this had to the course); Harry took the time to discreetly eye the guy that were sitting at the second front row. Heero Yuy. Harry had deliberatively waited until the last minute to enter the lecture room to avoid ending up within eyesight again of the other student. He was going to take this lecture as an opportunity to switch their positions and observe the other more closely to see why Harry hadn't taken any notable attention of him before his, frankly quite sudden, confession.

He got his answer almost straight away; the guy was obviously a loner. The reason Harry had never really taken any notice of him before was because he never engaged in conversations or arguments during class and only typed, almost fervently, on his laptop. So, since Harry had never even spoken to the guy before this Monday (or rather Heero had sort of spoken to him), how the bloody hell did he come to the conclusion that he was in love with the British exchange student? Did Harry do something to warrant that response? No, he didn't think he had and he couldn't recollect anything from his time staying here that he could have done anything remotely close to provoke that reaction out of the other either.

Wait, had Yuy somehow found out he was bisexual? But how? Harry had never talked about it or even mentioned it in passing around the other students. Hell, he hadn't even flirted with any males since he got here so there was no way he could have known about Harry's sexual orientation.

Harry hadn't even gone on this program expecting to find a partner. Long distance relationships never worked out for him. He'd had a boyfriend from Edinburgh during his vacation there that had first started out as a summer fling. The relationship only lasted two months though after he left to go back to London again and they both ended up cheating on each other (who did it first didn't matter to him). They ended the relationship on equal understanding that it wouldn't work out for them both. Earlier in his teens he'd also had a redheaded girlfriend, living in Dublin, with a temper to match her hair. They ended up having spats whenever they saw each other when entering the third month of their relationship, and then making up so many times that it had almost become a habit (at least that part had been nice). Their last fall-out however ended up being the last straw after Harry, on a trip to surprise her, had found her out in the process of full out snogging with another guy on the doorstep to her flat. Well, that spelled the end of that one.

All in all, whether be it male or female, Harry hadn't had any good experiences with long distance and had come to the conclusion that he just wasn't cut out for it. He simply didn't have the patience and drive of hard work to keep it going. In that sense, he'd eventually started seeing himself as a lost case when it came to relationships in general. Maybe he was doomed to flings and one-night stands.

Harry flipped a page in his textbook and mumbled along with the others as the teacher made them repeat the phrases in various, not so, successful attempts at pronouncing the Swedish words. He offhandedly noted that Yuy wasn't participating in the practice, before the teacher then split them into groups to go and practice their pronunciation. Perhaps sensing Harry's lingering eyes on him, Yuy turned around as he stood up from his seat to look back at the raven haired male. Harry averted his eyes before their gazes met and pretended he hadn't just been openly observing the Asian. And why did he avert his eyes anyway? He hadn't meant to but he had done it automatically. He followed his group out of the classroom and was aware of the stare that trailed after him.

Harry didn't see Yuy any more that day. The teacher had gone around to all the groups and after hearing them out, let them go on home for the day. He had half expected the other student to search him out again after the lecture but he went without crossing paths with Yuy.

Maybe, he thought, the guy had gotten the hint and left him alone.

Next day and lecture however he was yet again standing in front of a glaring Yuy. Although this time he hadn't even made it out of the lecture hall before the Asian male's shadow was looming over him. Harry paused in his collecting of his notebook and pencils to throw an upwards glance at the guy, their eyes locking for a second, before he went back to stuffing his things down into his bag.

"I love you." Yuy said.

Harry's eyebrow twitched with annoyance, but then he replaced it with a thoughtful frown. If his instincts were right, then if he didn't do something about this situation now then Yuy would probably be on his tail for the rest of his stay here. The guy certainly seemed like the stubborn enough type to follow through with such an endeavor.

"Why?" He asked.

Yuy's glare faltered slowly; a flash of confusion showing in his eyes. Well, well, looks like he hadn't expected to be questioned, Harry observed with some interest.

"Why?" Harry repeated. "Surely, if you suddenly tell me you love me, I deserve to know why?" The raven haired male reasoned.

"That is, reasonable." Yuy answered after his confusion had settled somewhat, but he still seemed a bit unsure.

Harry raised his eyebrows in expectation, looking at the male as said male clutched the belt to his bag that went over his chest while he adopted a thoughtful frown. Harry took the moment while Yuy decided what to say to take in the guy's appearance more closely; you know when the guy wasn't outright glaring at him and all. It obviously hadn't been a priority the first time Yuy spoke to him, but now he suddenly felt an interest to do so. Yuy, he realized first, didn't seem to care that much about his appearance. His clothes weren't dirty or sloppy per se, but it was obvious the male didn't put down much effort in keeping track of latest fashion trends and such. Not that Harry was particularly into fashion himself anyway. But, the guy was wearing yellow sneakers, yellow(!), light faded jeans and a laundry faded navy blue t-shirt above a green shirt. It certainly didn't help him to give him notice from other people or make them throw him a second glance.

Although, as Harry looked closer, the guy wasn't actually that bad looking when bypassing the attire that is. Quite fine-looking actually, in a quirky and awkward way.

"Uhm…"

Harry's eyes were drawn back to Yuy's face that looked down at him with slight hesitance.

"…I like how hardworking you are, how, how serious and smart you are when speaking your opinions in class."

Harry blinked once in surprise, he'd almost expected the guy to say he liked him because of his looks. He didn't mean to brag, but most were first attracted to his appearance. As long way back he could remember, people seldom approached him because of his personality (which some would describe studiously dull at times) but rather how tight his bum was. It was rare someone bothered taking a closer look at the content, if it wasn't to take a closer one of the content in his trousers that is.

"Hmm." Harry smiled crookedly. He was getting more interested in the guy despite earlier having decided he was simply going to brush him off. "It has nothing to do with my handsome features then?" He teased.

Yuy replied with his cheeks tinting with a barely noticeable pink hue. Harry had to clamp his teeth together to keep from snickering. The color wasn't complimenting at all in contrast to his darker skin tone, but still cute in that awkward way of his.

Harry rested his chin in one hand and grinned again.

"Let's go on a date then." He said, feeling an urge to see the guy's reaction and then enjoying Yuy's shocked face.

"…Alright." Yuy replied later, half-dazedly.

"Excellent!" Harry's grin grew in size. "This Friday then, I'll meet you outside school at seven."

"Okay." Yuy mumbled.

Harry rose from his seat, pulling on his bag on his shoulder and leaving a still confused and dazed Yuy in his wake.

* * *

><p>The invitation had been an act of impulse on Harry's part, but it wasn't every day (never actually) that he was approached by someone like this. Who knows it might be fun, and he still had the option of brushing the other off. Harry thought he was being nice when he offered to go on a date and had he not found the guy a bit cute he might not even have given the guy that chance. Yuy wasn't his type; he liked more outgoing persons that were able to keep up with him, had humor and had an appearance that was at least pleasing to the eye. Yuy was far from these qualifications, although his face wasn't half-bad, and he had triggered Harry's interest.<p>

Harry spent Thursday's lecture enjoying watching Yuy squirm in his seat whenever Harry would look at him for a longer period. Harry felt his mouth stretch with hidden amusement when Yuy tried to sneak a look at him from over his shoulder, only for their eyes to meet, causing his eyes to widen before tearing them away to the front of the class again. The most interesting part was how Yuy rubbed his ears in embarrassment; making Harry aware of the pink coloration of the tips of his ears.

Harry thought of mentioning it to the guy after the lecture was over, but then decided to spare him when they were still in school. The lecture came to an end and the other student packed his things in his bag and then was half way out of the room before Yuy suddenly halted, causing a few students to look at him annoyed when they had to go around him. Yuy threw an insecure frown in Harry's direction; as if suddenly uncertain he ought to wait for the British student. His eyes widened when he noticed Harry's crooked grin and he had to hold in his chuckles when Yuy tore his eyes away and marched out of the room, almost tripping on the doorstep in the process.

Harry held the back of his hand to his face to shield the amused grin and excused himself from the group of students that asked him if he wanted to join them for a cup of coffee (probably as he seemed to be in a better mood today). The people in this country drank all too much coffee Harry thought to himself, like it was water really, and Harry preferred tea to coffee any time. He politely declined the offer and spent the time on his way home pondering over the curious expectance he was feeling.

* * *

><p>Harry spent nearly ten minutes hiding behind a decorative stone wall that sat on the campus grounds while observing Yuy fiddling nervously with the sleeves of his (new?) red and grey shirt. The guy had on grey shorts and he had, thankfully, exchanged the dreadful mustard colored tennis shoes for some simple light grey cotton summer shoes. A closer inspection gave Harry the suspicion the whole attire was new since they didn't seem washed out at all. The raven haired male smiled lightly at the fact that Yuy had gone the trouble of buying new clothes for the date. He actually looked quite decent and presentable now. It was weird how Harry quickly found himself forgetting about his initial annoyance with the guy and exchanging it with thoughts of cuteness, since it was a first for him to think another guy cute even though he was bisexual.<p>

He hadn't meant to be early but he had unconsciously found himself showered, dressed, sitting on the bus and then getting off at the bus stop with fifteen minutes to spare before the scheduled time. Not wanting to seem eager or something, because that would show the other how interested Harry actually was, he had found himself sitting down on the wooden bench behind the stone wall to wait. Then his eyes had caught Yuy's figure waiting outside the University entrance. Surprised to find out the guy had arrived even earlier than Harry himself, he ended up unconsciously spying on the exchange student while he waited for the clock to pass the mark of five minutes after seven. That would be an okay time for him to show up he reasoned. He'd make Yuy squirm a little first.

Yuy was fidgeting slightly on the spot, and Harry could see even from his position the telltale signs of stiffness in the other's posture and the nervous wringing of the hands and sleeve fabric. When the clock was near ten past Harry rose from his seat and stepped out, starting up a walk and if anything looking like he'd just arrived. The sounds of his approaching steps alerted Yuy to his prescence and he noticed when the disappointment in the other's eyes was exchanged with relief. He felt guilty for his intentional delay for all of a short moment before pushing it away and exchanging it with a small grin.

"Hey." He said, flashing a charming smile, and noted how the guy forced himself to quit tugging at his sleeve from his nervousness.

"Hi." Yuy responded without the expected stammer, managing to compose himself rather well. Harry shoved down the initial pout at the lack of reaction and the missing embarrassed flushed cheeks.

"Shall we?" Harry motioned with his hand and turned his steps towards the city central, aware of how Yuy kept himself two paces exactly behind him.

A few times earlier that day Harry had found himself questioning his actions towards Yuy. He didn't have any plans of actually hooking up with the guy and even he thought it was perhaps somewhat cruel to be stringing the guy along like that. Though, he tried to smooth it over with his conscious that he was just going to let the guy have his little date and a small chat. He'd just tell Yuy at the end of the date that he didn't think it was going to work out between them and leave it at that. No major harm done.

As they strolled down the shopping street, Harry felt himself growing a little annoyed with the guy walking that far behind him. It didn't exactly give Harry a natural opening to try and strike up a conversation with the young man now did it? He rolled his eyes to the heavens, the action going unnoticed, before stopping at their destination.

Yuy, also coming to a stop behind him, cast him a glance before looking around at their surroundings. They were standing outside a small café mashed in-between a bookstore and a bank. Not waiting Harry made his way inside and was satisfied when Yuy dutifully followed him, almost like little puppy. He snickered to himself at the mental image.

"_Hej! Vad vill ni beställa?_" A blonde girl behind the counter looked up and flashed Harry a bright smile.

Harry returned it with a wide one of his own.

"Hello, well first off, I'd like a cup of tea, Earl Grey, please. Then perhaps a cinnamon bun."

"Oh, yes, one cup of tea and a cinnamon bun. Anything else?" The girl replied, easily enough switching languages while she punched on the keys to the register.

Harry looked over his shoulder at Yuy with an expectant look.

"Just coffee, black." Came the low and simple reply.

Harry just shrugged his shoulders and had a smile back in place.

"You heard the guy."

The girl rang the order up and turned her back to them to prepare their beverages and snack. Two steaming cups were placed on a red tray to accompany the rolled bread and pushed across the counter.

"That will be 48 crowns."

Harry had already picked up his wallet, pulled out his credit card and slotted it into the machine before Yuy noticed and could offer a protest.

"You don't-I can pay for myself." He hurried to say, sounding almost indignant about Harry paying for him.

"No, no, don't worry about it."

"But,-"

Harry sighed at the insistent protest. I mean, it was just a cup of coffee.

"Alright, if it bothers you, just buy me a cup in school sometime." He nonchalantly shooed the objection out of his path, pleased when Yuy finally backed down.

Taking the tray in hand, Harry led the two of them up a flight of stairs to the second floor and intentionally chose a more secluded corner where they wouldn't be disturbed all too much by the other guests.

Sitting down Harry took a sip out of the hot drink, rolling the liquid on his tongue before swallowing. Across him Yuy stared at his cup of coffee, obviously still feeling apprehensive about Harry paying for it and didn't look like he was going to talk anytime soon. Harry felt his inner self sigh and concluded that if they were going to get any conversation going then he had to initiate it himself.

"So, what did you do today?" He asked, taking another long sip.

Harry fixed his eyes on the slightly shorter male, watching the young man as he finally reached out to pull the cup into his two hands.

"I studied."

"All day?"

Yuy tilted his head carefully.

"More or less." He answered, his voice a bit thick and eyes a bit sketchy.

Harry hummed under his breath, throwing a glance out at the other tables, watching a mixed group of people laughing merrily on the other side of the floor. They looked dressed for clubbing and were probably soon headed for an apartment party in the neighborhood. He kind of wished he could go with them; maybe find himself a fun fling for the evening after he was done with Yuy. Yuy himself was still keeping his eyes stubbornly on the tabletop. Kind of rude really, but then again he supposed he could excuse the guy because it was the result of his nerves.

"Which country did you come from?"

"America."

Yuy took his first sip of the black liquid. Harry ignored his slight frown in distaste of the damned beverage. He'd wished Yuy wouldn't be another coffee drinker but he supposed his wish had been for naught.

"My guess was right then." Harry swirled the teaspoon around. "I'd thought so. Where are you from originally?"

Yuy shifted in his seat.

"Father's an American while my mother is Japanese, but I've lived all my life in America."

Ah, so he was only half Asian? Interesting, well, that certainly explained the clear cobalt blue eyes, and Yuy was giving him longer sentences as well. That certainly was an improvement conversation wise.

"I suppose you can pretty much guess where I'm from originally." Harry said, plastering on a smile.

"You're British." Yuy stated matter-of-factly.

Harry laughed softly at the prompt answer.

"Yes, I imagine my accent is a dead giveaway if anything. Not to mention my preference for tea, should clue anyone in that are still left unsure." He said airily, holding up said cup of tea meaningfully.

Harry's smile widened when he saw the corner if Yuy's mouth quirk upwards and finally those blue eyes looked up through the tousled fringe to glance at the raven haired young man before him.

"So," Harry said slowly, swirling his tea lazily. "What brings you here to this little country in the north besides to study?"

Harry raised an eyebrow when Yuy's fingers slipped once against the cup before grasping the handle properly.

"Just an opportunity, to see new things, I guess?" Yuy replied, but didn't sound all too sure about his reasons himself. How peculiar.

Harry could sense there was more to it but let it slip, not like it was any of his business if Yuy wanted to tell him the true reasons or not. Although it still annoyed him a bit, strangely enough.

"What about you?"

The returned question brought Harry out of his thoughts and he placed his chin in his hand in thought. So the guy was capable of keeping a semi conversation going after all. Well in that case, Harry ought to reward the little puppy.

"Never been out of the UK, so I thought it would be a good chance to get out of dreary old England for some new scenery. Maybe gain a new perspective on things." He added with a murmur.

He had started to grow bored with England lately, feeling a bit cramped in his surroundings. When his home university offered this exchange program he was one of the first ones to sign up for it.

Yuy nodded diminutively. Harry's eyes followed as the man's finger traced along the brim of the cup.

"It's nice to get away for a while, you know, a small break you could say."

"You don't like it in England?" Yuy asked him. Seemed like the guy was warming up, loosing some of that tension in his shoulders.

Harry eyed him and thought about the question.

"Yes, and no?" He said, pondering it. "Can't say I outright dislike the country, I did grow up there, but it has gotten a bit dreary lately. Part of the reason I came here I suppose."

"A change of scenery." Yuy repeated Harry's previous words.

"Yes." Harry sent the other young man a small smile, his deep green eyes taking in the other. Why was he talking about that with this guy? Yuy didn't need to know these things about Harry.

Yuy was still looking nervous, but at least he was gradually relaxing the further they came into the conversation. Harry eyed the man, a sudden idea popping up and he debated shortly with himself before coming to a decision.

"What are your plans for tonight?"

The question was innocent enough, the motive behind it, not as much.

"After this?" Yuy asked him with a frown. "I was going to study for the seminar…" He trailed off, blue eyes widening as Harry leaned forward onto the table.

Harry was giving the half Japanese young man a mischievous and gleaming look.

"Drink up, and then let's go have some proper fun."

* * *

><p>The music was loud and the beat thumping harshly throughout the place. The bass sent delicious shock waves through Harry's body and the floor vibrated under his feet. People were absolutely everywhere, dancing, hot, sweaty and many highly inebriated. It had been a spur of the moment thing, dragging the poor exchange student into a nightclub. A bloody nightclub, o fall things this certainly wasn't up Yuy's alley. He'd expected the other to decline, or refuse the invitation really. He figured this was definitively not Yuy's scene, but the other outright surprised Harry when he actually accepted with a determined look in his eyes. Maybe he'd underestimated the guy?<p>

Looking at him now though, huddled behind a table in the corner, it was pretty obvious to him that the guy must have begun to regret following along with Harry. Yuy was doing his best to keep away from the crowding people, a mission impossible, while at the same time keep close to the British male. Easier said than done, when there were not a small amount of people all together crowded in the club. Yuy was looking highly uncomfortable, although he did his best to hide it. It made Harry impressed with the young man's determination to stay with him. Harry had thought the other would simply excuse himself for the evening and go back home. He had actually counted on it, but now he was starting to wonder about the actual extent of Yuy's feelings for him. He had said he loved Harry, but the British male had figured it was just an infatuation, a crush. Maybe he ought to just call it all off and get Yuy out of here and put an end to his suffering before this experience turned into a bad memory.

Alright, he'll let Yuy out of here. But first he was entitled to one drink and it would be a shame to have paid the entrance fee without having at least one.

Knowing Yuy would follow him; Harry threw the guy a glance before making his way over to the bar and finding a spot at the end where he called for the bartender´s attention. Yuy slipped in on his left, his face creased in a nervous frown and constantly sending apprehensive glances at all the people around them. The other male was almost touching Harry's side in an attempt to stay close to him and Harry couldn't help grinning inwardly at this. A small pitiful puppy indeed.

Flagging down the bartender, Harry leaned forward to shout in the guy's ear.

"Two licorice shots!"

The answer was a nod and two shot glasses was dumped and filled to the brim on the top. Harry pushed one of the glasses towards Yuy who immediately started to shake his head.

Harry leaned in close and shouted similarly into Yuy's ear. The other male went stiff as Harry's breath wafted against the skin.

"Why not?"

"I-I don't drink." Yuy's voice was barely audible over the noise and Harry probably wouldn't have heard it if they weren't standing close together.

"Come on, just this one. Live a little." Harry coaxed and couldn't resist blowing out another puff of air to see if he could elicit a more interesting reaction from the poor guy.

Yuy shivered, their cheeks brushing lightly against each other as Harry withdrew, picking up the shot and holding it out to the flustered young man. The glass was eyed hesitantly, eyebrows creasing into a hard frown and Harry was about to retract it when Yuy's hand came out and took it. Harry watched with slight disbelief as the other took the whole glass in one go, of course resulting into a serious of harsh coughs as the alcohol burned its' way down his throat. Would this guy never cease to amaze him?

Harry laughed and downed his own drink, handling the effects much better than his companion.

"You want another one?" He asked and grinned at the half-scared look that flashed briefly in the other's features.

"One was enough." Yuy croaked.

I can see that, Harry thought amusedly.

"Maybe later." He amended and chuckled at Yuy's expression. Oh, this was turning into more fun than he'd first thought it would be. He wondered how far he could actually torment the other before he had enough. Was it worth it to try to see how far he could actually go in his teasing?

Yuy was leaning on the bar top with his elbows, trying to catch his breath. Harry observed his flushed cheeks and the closed eyes, letting the guy have a moment to compose himself.

"Come on." Harry said, grabbing a hold of Yuy's arm and guiding him to the far side of the room where he'd just spotted a few recently vacated seats.

He felt Yuy twitch but he didn't pull his arm out of Harry's hold.

The shorter male sank gratefully into the cushioned bench behind the table, most likely appreciating the table acting as a safety wall in-between him and the rest of the people there. Harry slid onto the bench from the other side and was delighted to see the blush spreading out on Yuy's cheeks at their close proximity, the tips of his ears soon following the same fate as his cheeks. Harry was intrigued. He was actually starting to think about what could happen if he actually decided to further encourage Yuy. There was no mistaking it now that the guy must have it bad for Harry. He saw that now, with how Yuy's nervous twitching of the hands pulled at his shorts and how his eyes again and again flicked in Harry's direction, more than once going down over the British young man's chest and lean legs. Harry raised an eyebrow when he caught Yuy's eye and almost chuckled out laud when he tore his eyes away. That is, all for a short moment before he was back to sneaking glances again. Harry's grin grew wider and he bowed to the urge to touch lightly with the back of his fingers across Yuy's left arm. He could feel the goose bumps despite the heat in the club. Encouraged when Yuy didn't pull away, Harry traced his fingertips teasingly down, tripping softly across the knuckles. He traced back up and tried to hide the large smirk that threatened to break out as he noticed dark blue eyes following his fingers' journey with rapt attention.

Growing bold, Harry leaned in, his chest coming into contact with Yuy's shoulder and raised his hand to trace his fingertips at the nape of the guy's neck. It was amusing to see the other's struggle between being stiff and shivering. He looked like he really wanted to turn his head towards Harry, but was hesitant as well as Harry breathed small puffs along the golden tanned skin below his ear. Harry was having far too much fun with this. He really ought to stop now before it got out of hand. Because it was definitively slowly getting out of hand. Was he even prepared for the consequences that were sure to follow if he gave in to his growing urges? This wouldn't be just a fling, at least not for Yuy, who was one of Harry's course mates and if things went sour between them he'd had to live through it for the rest of his stay here. And he could bet that it wasn't going to be pleasant.

Was it even right of him to take advantage of Yuy in this way? Sure, it might have started out as teasing and he'd had no intentions in the beginning to give the other any further encouragement or indication that this could eventually turn into a relationship. Hadn't he already made the decision to make it clear to Yuy that Harry had no intentions of that happening? That he had no romantic interest in him whatsoever? Right? Alright, he'd admit to slight attraction now, but that was all it was and he had no intentions of acting or going further than this.

But then why was Harry slowly brushing his lips against Yuy's neck while his fingers roved through the guy's tousled tresses? Why was he feeling excitement growing at the small sounds coming out of the young man's mouth as he licked or nipped the heated skin? And why, was his other hand slowly but surely finding its way to Yuy's crotch? This had not been part of the original plan, far from it. What the bloody hell was he doing? He had to stop, right now, before the situation became unsalvageable and he wound up causing Yuy undue harm and hurting the guy's feelings. If he pulled away now Yuy would probably still be a bit hurt, but he'd get eventually get over it. That is if he pulled away now.

He cursed himself for his lack of control as his hand found a growing bulge beneath the grey shorts, giving it a squeeze and guiltily taking pleasure out of the strangled low moan the action caused. Yuy's hand came up and tried to push the hand away weakly.

"There's," The guy breathed in. "There's people here."

Harry should've been thankful for Yuy's intervention, should've taken the opportunity to remove himself from the other guy, but yet again he felt his emotions taking control of his mind and overruling his rapidly failing logic.

"Let's get out of here." He heard himself say, his voice strained and a bit breathless, mightily pulling Yuy up from the seat and guiding them out of the club.

* * *

><p><strong>Continuation and end in the second and last part.<strong>


	2. Sweet and Cruel Memories Part 2

**Disclaimers: **I do not own any of the characters or elements from either universe. They all belong to their respective owners, J.K. Rowling and Sunrise. I lay no claim to either franchise. This is purely written for my own and others' enjoyment and I make no money of it.

**Summary: **Another exchange student makes a declaration of love to Harry out of the blue. Who is this person and why does Harry feel a connection to him?

**Pairing: **Heero/Harry/Heero.

**Warnings: Oneshot.** **SLASH.** **AU. **(no Gundams and no magic)** OOC. Bisexual Harry.**

Knowing Both the Sweet and the Cruel Memories

Part two

* * *

><p>'Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose.'<p>

From the television show _The Wonder Years_

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><p>The cool evening air washed over them. The street was filled with laughter and calls from countless groups of people. Harry steered them away from the main walkway into a side street before turning to his companion again.<p>

"Where do you live? I live outside town and it'll take at least fifteen minutes on the bus."

Yuy's eyes flashed a hidden dark emotion, probably guessing where this conversation was going to lead to, or rather the continuation from earlier.

"Down four blocks that way." He said thickly, inclining his head to his left and Harry unceremoniously changed their direction.

After a couple of minutes the slight resistance against Harry's hold made him halt and he looked back at Yuy, expression questioning.

"Here." Yuy said and moved towards a large doorway, Harry trailing along behind when he wouldn't let go of his hold.

Harry pulled up behind Yuy as the other man searched his pockets for keys. He leaned in to nuzzle the side of the neck before him and smirked as he noticed the slight tremors he caused and the key's jingling loudly as fingers searched for the right key to insert into the lock. The door swung open and slung an arm around Yuy's shoulders as the door closed behind them. Harry allowed him to lead them into the elevator where he let his hands brush against a clothed chest. The young man nearly pressed the wrong button when Harry began sucking at a patch of skin on the neck before him. Yuy pushed back against Harry's chest and bent his head to the side to give the raven haired man better access. Harry lavished attention to the smooth skin with his lips and tongue until the elevator jerked to a stop at their floor. He reluctantly unlatched his mouth and the two crossed over to an apartment door, which Yuy was record fast with unlocking and the two stumbled inside.

Well inside, Harry nearly jumped the other man and caused him to drop his keys on the floor. He toed off his shoes and was actually annoyed when Yuy had to bend down to untie his, in turn breaking their hold. The guy's fingers trembled lightly with the laces and Harry knelt down in front of him. With the laces undone and one shoe off, Harry lost patience and pulled off the last one, causing Yuy to fall backward onto his back. Harry was upon him within seconds and did what he'd been longing to do since leaving the club. He straddled Yuy and bent down over him, capturing the man's lips in a searing kiss that had the guy wrapping his arms around Harry's neck to keep him down. Their tongues locked together, the other male giving him a fair fight for dominance.

Harry gasped into the kiss when a hand squeezed his right buttocks. He had not expected that daring touch to his behind and he chuckled in the back of his throat, moving on with the offensive, his hand founding its' way under the shorts and along a thigh, letting Yuy know his appreciation and encouraging the other to take further initiatives. He didn't want a passive partner; he wanted to fight together for dominance all the way through, like battling with each other for who that could make the other surrender. Especially when it came to male partners.

Yuy grunted beneath him when Harry's weight came down on him and pressed his back into the hard surface.

"We should move off the floor…" Harry murmured against plump and swollen lips.

Yuy grunted in agreement this time and Harry reluctantly raised himself up to allow the other to get to his feet. He pulled the guy into his embrace again and proceeded with trailing kisses along a firm jaw as Yuy somehow managed to lead them through the apartment into what must have been the bedroom.

They fell sideways onto the single bed and hands were seeking out everything in their range to touch. The British rolled them around so that he was on top again, finding pleasure in delving underneath Yuy's shirt and massaging the surprisingly fit body beneath his palms. All the while he was fully enjoying himself as the other man had gone back to lavish attention to Harry's behind, kneading the buttocks and occasionally brushing down the back of a thigh. The touches were sending delicious tingles up his spine and he abandoned the kissing for now to lick the hollow above the collarbone. Harry hissed in pleasure when Yuy's hands pushed their way past the waistline of his trousers, diving underneath his underwear, and came into contact with bare skin. He moaned against the neck beneath, rising up to pull off his shirt. His slim muscles flexed as he stretched out his arms above his head and he noted with growing excitement how Yuy's cobalt blue eyes were locked solely on him, or rather his now bare chest. His hands came down to unbutton his trousers and he managed to pull down the zipper before one of Yuy's hands came to his front and grasped him through his underwear. He cried out at the touch, falling forward with his forehead plastered against Yuy's clothed chest. The massaging and kneading of his nether regions had him panting and moaning softly, his hands gripping tightly onto the shorter man's shoulders.

Where had this side of Yuy come from? Since when was he this bold and daring? For a moment he thought back to the flushed and embarrassed expressions of the so called 'lost little puppy'. Then he remembered how Yuy had come forth and confessed to him. Wouldn't one call that being daring to just come up and confess his feelings like that? No, Yuy had been daring from the start; he just hadn't showed much of that side of himself. But he was certainly doing it now.

Harry bucked into Yuy's hand, his arousal straining against the restricting fabric as he was continuously fondled in the front and back.

"Heero…" His voice came out, an almost begging tone to it and unconsciously calling the young man by his first name.

Heero's breath hitched and his hands paused. Harry frowned and looked up, meeting gleaming orbs that bore into him and caused him to shiver involuntarily.

"…Harry."

When his name rolled off Heero's lips Harry found himself struck by a small feeling of nostalgia making him frown harder. There was something almost familiar about the way Heero had spoken his name. He didn't receive much time to ponder his bewildered thoughts as his breath was caught in his throat.

Heero had pushed himself up, hefted his hands at the hem of his shirt and pulled it off. Leaving him equally exposed. Harry let his eyes rove over the view before him, the fit body showing off a flat abdomen, lightly defined chest muscles and slightly dark nipples. His hands came down to caress and follow the lines slowly, taking in every dent and firmness he found. A hand touched his cheek and he looked up again. Green met blue. They gravitated towards each other and devoured each other's mouths. Heero was pulling at his hair, pulling their faces and chests closer together. A hand splayed between his shoulder blades.

His trousers was sliding down, Heero's hands pushing them down further and exposing his rear end. Hot fingers danced above his cleft and he moaned before pushing at Heero with his hands.

"I want to touch you first." He breathed, his hands searching their way down to the front of the man's trousers and giving the bulge there a firm squeeze to show exactly where he wanted to touch other the man.

Heero grunted and his hands went to grasp Harry's hips instead, sliding up his sides as Harry slid down until his face was level with the man's bellybutton. He bent down to nuzzle the arousal, massaging a clothed hipbone, before reaching to free the other from his confinement. Heero sucked in a breath as his erection sprang forth and stood up proud. Harry eyed it, licking his lips and sending a mischievous look at the wide blue orbs. Pleased to note the rosy tinge to the man's cheek and the flash of nervousness in his eyes, knowing what Harry was about to do.

Deciding not to prolong his inspection any longer for the poor man's sake, Harry leant down and flicked a red tongue across the head. The little touch sent a tremor through his partner, stopping his breathing as Harry went in for a second and third swipe. He lavished considerable attention to the length and planted his hands on the man's hip to steady him when he started squirming. Heero's hands dove into his raven locks and made his hair an even bigger mess than what it had been before. The man's breath was coming out in short gasps. Harry glanced up to see the man had thrown his head back after Harry had taken it into his mouth and added suction to it. Deep green eyes fastened against the writhing figure before him, wondering how he could have dismissed him like that in the beginning. He felt a twinge inside knowing that he could've very well not been there right now, enjoying the person in front of him if he hadn't followed his urges.

There was a connection between them; he could feel it inside of him. He just couldn't figure out where it had come from. He hadn't really taken notice of Heero until these last few days, there hadn't been enough time for him to grow this kind of connection to someone.

He moaned in protest when Heero grasped his head and pulled him off his treat. There was a heat, a blaze, behind those eyes and Harry shivered involuntarily. Arms wound around his frame and pulled him close. His own arms circled around shoulders as Heero's hands slid down. Palms and fingers caressed his buttocks and Harry pressed closer to the man, brushing their arousals together. They hissed at the friction and Harry teasingly rolled his hips. Heero retaliated by taking a firm hold of his behind and sliding fingers down to touch and press down at the pucker there, teasing the man back.

Harry growled lightly and he was momentarily stunned at the low and short chuckle that vibrated beside his ear. He realized that it was the first time he'd heard the man laugh in any sort of way, yet at the same time it felt eerily familiar. His thought was shoved back when a slick finger probed the opening and then pushed inside, making him focus solely on the body pressed against his and the hands and fingers touching him intimately.

He tried taking slow breaths to help him relax, knowing that it would make it easier on himself. He suspected Heero had had previous experiences in this and he tried to ignore the little twinge in his chest at the thought. Don't be ridiculous, they were both grown men, of course Heero had been with others before him like Harry had been with others before Heero.

When that particular spot inside him was touched he clamped teeth together and gave a long guttural moan. Harry's reaction acting as an obvious clue, Heero pressed against the spot again, repeating the motion until he had Harry arching his back, arousals mingling, and crying out in time with the pressures. His fingers dug into Heero's shoulders, surely leaving marks in their wake.

"…Heero…_please_…"

His words must have struck a chord within the young man. Fingers slipped out with a wet sound and Heero's movement was suddenly hurried and a touch desperate. He lifted Harry up with his hands, leaving one grasping the raven haired man's hip as the other slipped in-between them and guided his arousal to the puckered opening. Letting gravity do the work; Harry slipped down and felt how Heero's length breached passed the opening and slipped inside. Using both his hands; Heero pushed Harry down the rest of the way, causing the British male to cry out.

He took a few harsh breaths to try and steady his breathing, relaxing his muscles and taking a little time to adjust since it had been a while for him. Heero's patience didn't last long and strong tanned hands lifted pale hips to drop them back down again in a rush. Harry cried out again, helping by also rising himself up and using Heero's hands on his hips to steady him as they established an even but quick pace. Their moans mingled together. Harry's arms had come to cross behind Heero's neck and hands had buried themselves in the chocolate brown tresses. Heero's head pressed against his chest, kissing whatever skin he could reach and occasionally flicking a tip of a tongue against a rosy nipple.

He was whimpering now, the pleasure had been steadily building up and he could only cling desperately to Heero as he felt himself getting closer. The length inside of him was swelling, he knew Heero wasn't far off himself and the rhythm grew erratic when Harry couldn't keep himself steady anymore. A final push against his pleasure point had him tipping over and spilling his desire between their stomachs. He clamped down on the length inside and let himself be lifted a couple more times as Heero worked himself to his own end and finally he could feel another warmth spreading inside after Heero slammed home one last time and froze as he rode the wave of pleasure.

They fell back onto the bed when Harry's slumping weight caused Heero to be unable to keep them both up. Harry lay tired and flushed against the other man's chest, heaving for breath together. Feeling Heero soften inside; Harry pulled himself up and lifted himself to the side and falling down again on the man's side instead. His green eyes were half lidded as he caught his breath and stared at Heero's profile.

He'd done it. He'd slept with the other man and there was no turning back now. Somehow though, Harry wasn't fretting as much as he should've been now that his senses were slowly returning to him. Maybe this was supposed to happen? Who knows what had changed? Harry felt himself drawn to the other man, he was certainly attracted to him or else this wouldn't have happened, and then there was that feeling of a connection between them. He wondered if Heero felt the same? He had said he loved Harry after all. Was this feeling that he was referring to? But that couldn't be it, I mean love didn't happen just like that, it took time right? Some sort of affection maybe, he'd admit to that. Oh, and let's not forget the newly found definite sexual tension between them.

Harry frowned lightly, raising his hand to touch it lightly to Heero's cheek, watching as the other stirred, eyes fluttering open, and turning his head to Harry. Their eyes met and Harry felt himself getting lost in those cobalt depths, he simply couldn't look away. They lay there, watching each other as Harry's thoughts swirled inside and he unconsciously let his eyes travel across the expanse of golden and silky skin before him. Harry was almost embarrassed to notice a stirring inside when one certain thought entered his mind.

He glanced surreptitiously at Heero, wondering if the man would have enough energy for another round since it was becoming quickly obvious to Harry that his libido was not going to back down. The man frowned at him when he noticed the look and only when Harry pulled closer to press himself against the man's side did realization enter his features. Heero seemed surprised at the turn of events, but a gleam of happiness showed in his eyes that had Harry's heart thumping wildly.

He leaned in and gave the man a long deep kiss. Meanwhile his right hand came down on a smooth chest and stroked across the skin. The hand sneaked down and wrapped itself around the soft flesh, stroking it. Harry swallowed Heero's moans and was delighted when he felt the member begin to harden under his ministrations, his fingertips playing with the package below teasingly. He drew back to enjoy the man's expression of pleasure, want and need, watching raptly as his mouth was just slightly opened and how he licked his lips.

Harry nudged Heero's side softly to make him turn on his side, and then pressed up behind him.

"The lube?" He asked lowly. He was sure Heero had it since the man had used it on Harry himself before.

The man shifted slightly and then reached a hand over his shoulders, a tube in hand. Harry spread an amount on his fingers and made sure to cover most of the appendages.

"Lift you leg for me." He murmured into an ear and dutifully the man lifted it and hooked a hand under the knee to keep it up.

Harry planted a soft kiss at the nape of the neck in front of him before his fingers travelled down. As he pushed at the opening, heard Heero let go of a breath and then suck in a new one as Harry pushed inside. It was hot inside and he took his time doing a proper job and trying to find that certain spot. It didn't take long and he soon had a writhing mass of limbs in front of him and sweet sounds coming out of the man's mouth in a never ending stream. The sounds caressed his ears and had his arousal stiff with need.

"It's…enough…" Heero croaked out in-between moans, turning his head as far back as he could to fix his smoldering gaze at Harry.

Wasting no time, Harry quickly prepared himself and hooked his arm under Heero's leg to relieve him. He brushed his member against the entrance, teasing the man before said man gave him an impatient growl. Taking the not so discreet hint, Harry pushed in halfway and seated himself. He could feel the man tightening around him and caressed the man's thigh softly, waiting until he felt the muscles relax and then pushed the rest of the way inside. He closed his eyes as the warmth of the other surrounded him and he took a deep breath before pulling out and driving back inside.

He was breathing harshly into the back of Heero's neck, washing his hot breath against the skin there while the man's hair tickled his nose. He adjusted his legs, getting better leverage, and managed to thrust deeper inside, making the man expel a breathy whimper and clutch the sheets in his hands for something to hold onto to. He drove consistently into the other man, making Heero's vocal outbursts grow in volume.

He didn't want it to end, but knew that it had to eventually. He flipped them over, Heero landing on his stomach, Harry poised above him as he reentered in one fell swoop. The man's cries were muted against the mattress, his hands yet again clinging to the sheets. Harry pounded almost harshly into the man and body beneath him, seeking to bring their completion to them both. He could hear himself, his loud and harsh breathing echoing in his ears, his body possessed by a strange frenzy. He managed to hit the special spot inside Heero a series of times and was rewarded when the muscles clamped down on him and Heero nearly howled into the pillow he had bitten down into to keep from being too loud.

The clamping of the muscles spelled the end for Harry and he gave a small shout, ramming himself deep inside and spilling himself inside the man.

One of the last things Harry remembers is how Heero, after regaining some of his senses, reaches down and drapes them both with the blanket. How he snuggles up to Harry and gently wraps his arm around his pale waist and brushes away his bangs, giving the raven haired male a small peck just beneath the hairline.

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><p>Harry's sitting on a chair, in a kitchen and in an apartment which, by the way, he's never been to before until just last night. Harry doesn't know what to say, or comment, about the current situation. He's nursing a cup of lemon and mint tea in his hands, courtesy of his host, while waiting for said host to serve their breakfast. And not just any breakfast, his host has gone far and beyond and actually prepared him a proper breakfast worthy of his mother's home country.<p>

As soon as all the plates' sits on the table, Harry can't help the stare he focuses on Heero as the young man slides into the seat opposite him like it was an everyday occurrence for Harry to be sharing breakfast with him. Harry had perhaps expected a few exchanged words in the morning and being offered a shower to properly clean himself, of course, but not a bloody breakfast buffet! He was starting to think that he was way in over his head. He was becoming unsure and apprehensive about what Heero was thinking about them now. Did he think they were in a proper relationship and all now, just because they'd shared one night together, a very enjoyable night he had to admit, but that was beside the point. The point was, what impression did Heero have of Harry's feelings towards him? Had he taken yesterday's bouts in the bed as Harry's confirmation of his feelings? Because that would be a problem. While Harry certainly had developed some sort of affection for the guy, it did not mean he loved him. It just meant that he thought Heero was a cute, although quite awkward, guy and that he was attracted to him. That was it. Or at least so he thought. He couldn't actually be quite sure, even if he wanted to be, because there had been that strange connection he'd felt yesterday. There had been something familiar about it, almost nostalgic even. Which was just plain weird; not to mention slightly freaky in a sense since he had never met the guy before in his life until just recently.

"Harry?"

Was he missing something? Was there some large piece of a puzzle that he'd somehow forgotten about and that would explain all of this? Explain why he felt connected to this guy and why he wasn't already sitting on the bus on his way back home where a simple bread breakfast would wait for him and not this impressive display.

"Harry."

So what the bloody hell was going on here? He demanded answers and he wanted them now!

"Harry!"

"What?"

Harry jerked out of his racing thoughts and blinked at the frowning man opposite him.

"What is it?" Harry repeated distractedly, his thoughts soon acting up again while Heero stared worriedly at him.

"Are you alright?" The man asked carefully.

Was he alright?

"I don't know." He answered.

If anything the worried frown grew at his reply. Okay, he admitted that wasn't the best reassuring answer he could've given, even if it was the truth.

"What I mean is," He hurried to say. "Is that I didn't expect, well, all this." He said with a wave towards the table's contents.

A small rosy tinge graced the man's cheeks at that.

"You don't like it?" He asked, sounding slightly unsure.

Harry sighed inwardly.

"No, no, I didn't mean it like that. It's, lovely. Thank you."

Heero gave a small smile, his eyes lighting up and Harry's heart skipped a beat, suddenly feeling a bit flushed.

Wait, what just happened there? Did his, did his heart actually skip a beat? No no no, just no. It didn't skip or jump or trip or anything. It. Did. Not. Skip.

Heero asked for Harry's bowl, filling it with rice and when passing it back, their fingers brushed the lightest together, completely accidental really. Heero's rosy tinged cheeks became blushing cheeks and in turn Harry felt his heart skip a beat again, then another, and another. The feel of Heero's touch lingered, tingling his nerves. Finally he had to force himself to breath or suffer suffocation.

It skipped. His heart. Bloody. Frickin'. Skipped! Not once, not twice but several times! Oh this can't be happening. There was just no way this could be happening. It was utterly ridiculous. He was not, you know, with Heero. Stuff like that only happens in fairy tales and sappy romantic comedies. Not in real life and not to Harry.

Harry absently took a bite out of the food, stopping himself when he tasted how delicious it was. Okay, so Heero was actually a good cook, a very good cook he amended as he reached for more bites.

"You sure you made this?" He asked unabashedly, mouth half full. "This is absolutely delicious." He praised.

Heero smiled, still blushing.

"I'd hoped you'd like it, since I did my best to reproduce my mother's flavors. You always did like her cooking."

When the sentence registered Harry immediately stopped chewing. Heero appeared stunned himself for a second before he covered his mouth with one hand. Panic flashing in his eyes.

"Wait, what did you just say?" Harry asked in a low, confused voice. When no reply came he asked again. "What did you mean I always liked her cooking? How could I? I've never met her before; I've never met you before, right?" He added unsurely.

The hurt and sadness showing in Heero's face had Harry faltering.

"No, wait, have we met before…?" Harry asked, his heart twitching almost painfully at the man's devastated expression.

"Heero. Have we met before?" He repeated with more force when he got no answer.

Heero stared at him before giving a small nod, his head slumping and hands coming to rest in his lap to await Harry's response.

Harry stared at the down bent face, wondering how he ever could have met Heero at some point in his life and not remember anything of it. Unless he had been really small, too young to remember, but if so how did Heero remember him? Shouldn't he be around Harry's own age and he also found it hard to believe that only Heero would remember.

"When?" Harry asked.

Heero looked up confused.

"What?"

"When did we meet the first time?" He elaborated.

Heero seemed surprised, and slightly apprehensive at first, but a hard stare from Harry had him swallowing and then nodding.

"It was the summer after I'd turned thirteen."

Harry shook his head at that.

"I'd remember if we'd met then, you and me are pretty close in age right? How old are you now?"

"24."

Harry nodded.

"As I thought, I'm 25, so how could I have forgotten about something that happened to me when I was as old as fourteen?"

Heero became troubled at the question and avoided looking in Harry's eyes. Harry's suspicions grew at the other man's behavior and he tried to look back and remember that summer. He was surprised and shocked when he actually drew up a complete blank. He didn't even remember celebrating his fourteenth birthday, however he could still remember the one before and after.

Something was wrong here, he thought, with his heart starting to hammer as strange emotions began to well up. Why can't he remember? The blank void that greeted him was scaring him and his hands had reached up to cradle his head, his green eyes wide with beginning fear. The raw emotion of fear that gripped his heart was terrible. Something had happened at that time. He just knew it. Something bad, but he couldn't remember what.

" I don't remember…" He sounded so confused. "Why can't I remember?" He asked no one in particular, the fear starting to show in his voice and making Heero frown in alarmed worry.

He was breathing harshly, he noticed in the corner of his eye how quickly Heero rounded the table to stand beside him and grasp Harry's shoulders in his strong and firm hands.

"Harry, it's fine, don't think about it." The man urged him, his blue eyes eyeing him with concern.

"What do you mean 'it's fine'?" Harry cried. "I'm telling you I _can't remember_."

His eyes began flicking from side to side, that fear that had gripped his heart weighing him down while something inside was telling him run, to hide, but from what?

"Why? I don't understand, why do I need to run…?"

If Harry had been looking more closely at Heero's face he would've seen it lose a fair amount of color at his words.

"Harry? Stay with me, there's nothing for you to worry about. Stay with me!" He said firmly, trying to sound assertive, trying to snap the man out of it.

Something in Harry's mind's eye caused his real ones to widen as he cried out and pushed Heero away from him. He tripped backwards, the chair clattering against the floor. Suddenly needing some place to hide, he back pedaled until his back hit the wall, his head spinning around searching for the thing that was chasing him.

"Harry!" Heero called out to him, rushing after and kneeling in front of him. "You need breath, you need to calm down, it's not real, take slow deep breaths." The man implored him.

Harry shook his head.

"No, no I need to- I need to hide-"

Harry face was grasped in-between two warm hands that forced him to focus onto worried blue eyes. His chest was heaving, he was breathing so fast it hurt everything he pulled in a breath. He was getting dizzy, he wasn't getting enough air.

"Harry, listen to me." Heero's voice commanded and Harry forced himself to do so. "It's. Not. Real."

"…it's not real?" He repeated unsurely.

Heero nodded an affirmative.

"No. It's only in your head."

Harry stared at the man in front of him, his breath slowly easing and his heartbeat slowing down as the fear that had gripped him faded slowly. He tried taking a deep breath, and then another.

"That's it, deep breaths." Heero's voice soothed.

Eventually Harry's eyes began to clear and he was able to focus on the face before him.

"Heero?" He said, frowning. "What happened? What's wrong with me?"

Heero's eyes shimmered and Harry found himself enveloped in a tight embrace.

"I'm sorry!"

Harry frowned harder.

"Why are you sorry?"

"It was all my fault!"

The raven haired man reached up to grasp the arms holding him.

"What do you mean?"

For a long moment Heero just held onto him, not saying anything. Harry wound his arms around the man in a show of reassurance despite his own confusion.

"Heero?"

"It was my fault…"

Harry heard him whisper.

"Heero, tell me what's going on."

He could sense the uncertainty in the man's body language, and when Heero shook his head Harry pushed him gently off him, though still keeping a hold of his arms.

"Heero."

Heero bit his lip, looking down into his lap. Looking up again he let out a tired and sad sigh, staring at Harry's hand on his one arm before looking up again.

"I was thirteen." He said.

Harry nodded for him to go on.

"I was at home, in the library, doing my summer homework when father walked in. With him was his current attorney," Heero paused, glancing at Harry. "James Potter."

"My dad?" Harry questioned, recognizing the name and his father's occupation.

Heero nodded and continued.

"I knew father had a meeting that day, but I was surprised at why he had gone to the library and not his office like usual. But then I noticed another boy, you, standing behind my father's attorney. Apparently your father had been forced to bring you with him because he didn't want to leave you alone at the house with no one else at home. He'd asked my father if he could bring you along instead of rescheduling, since father also had a son, me, that was about the same age."

Everything he was hearing was new to him, except the tiny bit about his father. He couldn't bring himself to remember anything that Heero was telling him.

"They left you in the library with me." Heero smiled crookedly then. "When you saw that I'd been doing my homework you immediately decided to drag me out of there, since you had no intention of just sitting there watching me do my homework."

Harry snorted.

"I wasn't that fond of school when I was younger. Thought it was a waste of precious time and lots of idiotic teachers."

"Yes, you made an extra effort to make that all too clear for me." Heero chuckled lightly.

Harry smiled in response.

"That was the first time we met. After that you would happen to tag along with your father once in a while. Every time you came around you would drag me out of that stuffy house to swim in the pool or play pranks on the staff."

"Really?" Harry asked with a small amused smile. It did sound a lot like him when he was that age. He certainly was a prankster.

"My father even got furious with us at one time after you'd somehow managed to set every clock in the house ahead one hour. _Every_ clock in the house, all 16 of them."

"I'm impressed with myself." Harry said with a self-satisfied smirk.

Heero sent him a reproaching glare, but it didn't have any real force behind it. His expression changed into a hesitant one.

"Go on." Harry nudged him.

Looks like they were getting to the heart of the matter, so to speak.

"Father had many enemies; it wasn't unusual for him to receive the occasional death threat."

"'The occasional'?" Harry repeated incrediously.

Heero let it slide without a reply.

"However the threats had only been that, empty threats meant to scare, so he thought nothing of it when another one arrived. Although this one did have him disturbed because it didn't exactly involve him, but rather me."

"They threatened to kill you?" Harry asked carefully.

"Yes, but since none of the other threats had been serious he thought the same about this one."

Harry frowned. He didn't like where this was going.

"What happened?"

"One day your father left you at the house while he and my father went on business in the city. That day we were playing cards on the grass in the back garden. Then…" Heero's lips thinned and his eyes glazed over, looking troubled. "This man came running out of the bushes, screaming madly at us. In his hand he was holding this large knife…"

Harry stared wide eyed the young man.

"…I was frozen, shocked with confused fear, but you grabbed my hand, dragging me to my feet and pulled me into a run. We ran towards the house, thinking someone would be there to help us but we couldn't find anyone of the staff. We could hear his enraged cries as he entered the house. We fled into the lounge; there was a large cabinet there where we could hide. We didn't get it open at first, the doors were jammed, but then it opened and you shoved me inside, you were supposed to hide there with me, but he'd caught up with us. He saw you standing by the cabinet; he'd spotted you and realizing that you sent me a last scared look before running in the opposite direction. You were drawing him away from me. You saved me, but…" Heero choked, his eyes shimmering. "Who was going to save you now? He was so close and you wouldn't be able to outrun him. They said, they said that you ran into a maid. That she tried to protect you, he…he stabbed her, right there, in front of you, several times. Then he grabbed you, he wanted you to tell him where I was hiding but you wouldn't to tell him. He became furious, slammed your head into the wall. It knocked you out. He, he was going to kill you too, but then a few of the staff arrived. The man's shouts and the maid's screams before she died had alerted the rest of the staff. They managed to bring him down before he could kill you, but, but Harry, if they had been even a moment too late, you, you would have died. It was my fault that you almost died."

Heero was crying, the tears ran freely down his face and Harry couldn't bring himself to say or do at the pure shock of the story. Blinking once though, seeing Heero in front of him, on his knees, in pain and blaming himself for something that he hadn't had any control over; Harry shoved his shock to the side for now and pulled the young man into his arms. Only tightening them when Heero struggled against the hold.

"It was not your fault." He said, frowning when Heero just shook his head in denial. "It wasn't your fault. It was that man's fault, not yours, not mine, not anyone else's but that man's fault. He was the one that killed that maid."

"He almost killed you." Heero choked against his shoulder.

"But he didn't." Harry stressed.

"He hurt you."

"I'm fine now."

Heero pulled away enough to look into Harry's eyes.

"No, you're not fine. You lost your memory. The doctors said that the emotional trauma and hit to your head caused you to forget everything, forget everything about him, but you also forget everything we had done. You forgot about me."

Harry took Heero's face in his hands, in very much the same way Heero had done to him before.

"I'm sorry I forgot about you."

Heero frowned and another tear spilled down his cheek. Harry wiped the stray tear away with his thumb, leaning in and giving the young man a long gentle kiss.

"What happened afterwards?" He asked, pulling Heero down to rest his head against his chest, while he secured his arms around the other.

Heero soaked up the warmth in Harry's hold before continuing.

"Your family, after they'd learnt about your loss of memory, decided to go back to England. They had only just moved to America and thought it would be best to go back since you didn't remember anything of your stay there anyway. I thought then I was never going to see you again."

"But you did. I'm here now. Talk about a strange twist of fate." Harry chuckled.

Heero squirmed in his hold and Harry took notice of the young man's slightly guilty and sheepish expression. Harry raised an eyebrow in question; silently demanding to know what was going on.

"A year back, while in England for a business trip, my father happened to accidently stumble into each other. Your father was the legal advisor for the owner of a company that my father's company was planning a contract with. They talked a bit, asking your father if everything was alright with you, if you had grown into a fine young man." Heero smiled at that. "When he came back home he told me about you, about how you were currently attending a university in London studying history."

Heero went back to looking guiltily embarrassed.

"I looked you up in the university registry, contacting a few people and eventually found out that you were going on a exchange program to Sweden. I admit I pulled a few strings to get me a spot for the same exchange program from an American university."

Heero held his breath while he waited for the protests to come, but what he got was just chuckles. Harry couldn't believe Heero, this person, had gone so far just to meet with him again after all those years, fully knowing that Harry didn't remember anything about him.

"I can't believe you actually did that, but" Harry sighed once and gave a small smile. "I guess I can still understand. I think I would've done the same thing. But I still think you should've told me from the beginning." He chastised playfully.

"How could I?" Heero argued. "You wouldn't believe me and I was afraid that your parents would become angry with me if they found out I had even approached you."

"Which reminds me." Harry said suddenly. "Why were you glaring like that at me that first time?"

"Glaring?" Heero questioned.

"Yes! When you told me you loved me out of the blue that day. You were practically glaring holes into my head and I didn't know what to think at first. Did the guy love or hate me?"

Heero spluttered indignantly.

"I was just-I was just really nervous. I hadn't talked to you for over ten whole years. I didn't even plan to confess my feelings at first. I just wanted to see you again, wondering how you had changed and make sure that you were really okay. I just realized that I loved you the day before that and I was sure that you were going to reject."

"So you didn't actually know I was bisexual?"

"You're bisexual?" Heero asked him surprised.

Harry raised an incredulous eyebrow.

"What do you call it that we did last night then?" He asked

He was answered with a blush and embarrassed pout.

Harry laughed at his expression, feeling somehow lighter now. Like that piece of the puzzle had finally fallen into the right place.

"I still don't remember anything." He said.

"Harry," Heero started but Harry shushed him with a finger to his lips.

"But you know what, I'm only sad about it because I forgot about you. It makes me sad to know that I might have never met you again if you hadn't done what you done. So thank you." He grinned at the deepening blush and hugged the young man close to his heart.

"Don't ever forget me again." Heero whispered softly after a short moment of silence.

"I promise."

He felt Heero wound his arms around him and he tightened his hold around the young man in return.

No, he would never forget again. Not when this man filled his heart with such warmth that he hadn't known for probably a very long time. Maybe this really was it after all. Maybe the swelling of his heart at the warm body against his meant that he had found that abstract thing he thought he'd never find. He could only wait and see what the future would bring to him and the man in his arms.

FIN.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: … … … :stares at the last page: …is it? Is it really finished? … :stunned silence: It is! Oh my gawd I thought this story would never end! It just kept going and going and going…I had planned for it to be like 8500 words or something…it ended up being over 14 300 words long… -.-;; So be grateful that I didn't give up halfway in the end there, I was really tempted, but forced myself to finish it. It's finally finished! T.T Anyway, please leave a review if you liked it! Cheers! Lin **


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